Treatment 11

Wow!! Only 1 more! We are super excited!!! :)

This treatment is going well so far. As well as it ever does. For some reason the anti-nausea medicine isn't working as well as it normally does, but other than that nothing is really bad so far, which is good!

Still no word from the surgeon on if they are going to leave the surgery at the current date, but we are hoping it doesn't change too much. It is nice to think we are so close to being done. We are just holding our breath to know if there is anymore cancer, or if it spread. That determines the next year or more of our lives so we are anxious to know. We are praying hard to have no more cancer, but I already decided he doesn't get to have any more cancer so I guess we don't need to keep worrying! :)

Glad things this treatment:

- The staff at the center is so amazing. We have become friends with them all. I don't know what we would do without the staff there. They are so happy and positive. It is great because they are all SO different too! They each bring their only unique personality and spirit. It is great. :) Apart from being so kind, they are so good at what they do. They take such good care of Kent and the other patients there.

- The new friends we met today. Kent was extra talkative today and the other patients talking today too. We met 4 new friends today. They are all at different levels in their treatments and are all emotionally at different levels of acceptance, but I am grateful to meet them and to share stories with them.

2 of the individuals we met today told us how their treatments involve certain procedures and medications that will last the rest of their lives. We hope that they might be blessed in their journey and pray it goes well. As sad as we are that they must continue their treatments like that, we are grateful that the end of Kent's is in sight.

We decided that Kennedy is going to come with us for Kent's last treatment. 2 weeks from Thursday we are going to have him come and help his daddy ring the victory bell! You get to ring the bell on your last treatment. We think Kennedy is going to love the bell! :)

Congrats to our sweet friend who is supposed to finish he treatments next week! You made it!!

Here are a few pictures I thought they were appropriate! Chemo is a journey that isn't easy, and I admire those who go through it.

The impossible is almost DONE!!!

Treatment 10

Yay! Treatment 10 is done. We are so grateful it is finished. Kent still never really got better, but they said that is what happens with chemo! We more or less expected this, but we figured it would have happened a long time ago. We hoped with all his other rare side effects, maybe the never getting better aspect would skip him. It didn't, but that is ok. Only 2 treatments left!! The plan right now is to push through and just finish. No more breaks, unless something "scary" happens. I assume that means his white blood cell count gets really low or something.

Have you seen Pollyanna? She plays a game called "The Glad Game". I am trying to make it my new motto! No matter our trials there is always some good, right? So this week in chemo, some of the "glad things" we saw are:

Blessings (Glad things) during treatment 10:
 - Only 2 treatments left!
 - The week off has encouraged us that the abdominal pain Kent has is just another one of those odd side effects. There had been concern about it being the result of surgical complications or that it could be permanent from chemo. It started to ease up during the extra week so the doctor thinks if we give it a few weeks after chemo the pain should be completely gone!!
 - Kent was able to sleep through his chemo treatment! This always seems to help him have a better cycle than when he is awake and feeling it slowly make him feel worse.
 - While  Kent slept I spoke with another patient next to us. We have met him before, but we have never exchanged names. (Why? Who knows!) He is probably in his 50's, but is super nice. I was just reading and he kept leaning over "Excuse me miss, sorry to bother you, but have you heard about..." and he told me about a bunch of sports things. He is so optimistic! The good news though is that he had just found out that day that his test results show he is now in remission. He will finish his treatments, but the cancer is done. I was so happy for him that I started to cry! I am so grateful that he received that news. I am praying we get that news too, along with all of our friends from chemo. I had recently met a young woman whose father has been in remission 3 times and is now it is back and worse than ever. She told me, just before finding our Kent has cancer, that remission is a lie. That cancer always comes back, that it truly never leaves, and anyone who tells you differently is lying. I have been told that several times, but hearing this mans news warmed my heart and gave me great hope for the future! Even if it comes back at a later date he has received the blessing of more time and hopefully less sickness! I hope every patient with cancer gets that ray of hope, of remission. That mans story warmed my heart. He left chemo with a quick squeeze on my shoulder, a good luck, and a skip in his step. I am so grateful for his happiness. :)

Not Quite Treatment 10

We almost had treatment 10 on Tuesday. However, when we met with our doctor he determined that Kent was too sick to have the current treatment at this time. Kent got really sick this last treatment and he stayed sick the entire time. At the doctor's suggestion we decided to wait an extra week before continuing treatments. That puts all the treatments off a week, but we felt that it was the best thing. They said unfortunately the next few are going to be really tough treatments, that without the break Kent probably would be unable to complete all of his treatments. We are grateful that Kent has the extra week to try and feel a little better. We are especially grateful that treatments are almost done! Hurray!! :) We are so grateful for all the love we have felt, all the support we have been given as we worked through all of this. We are also very grateful to know that our Father in Heaven and our Savior Jesus Christ have been with us through it all.

Treatment 9

So, let's start with some clarification. I have heard from MANY loved ones that my last entry sounded kinda.... depressed? That is probably the most concise word I can think of to explain what people have told me. I am very sorry! Truthfully I was going for the opposite! But, anyways... the explanation. Things are looking good. Our surgeon made some comments that pretty much made it sound like Kent had very limited time left. We left unsure and worried, but we have since spoken with our Oncologist and he says things are looking as we originally thought. The hope is still that the chemo is working its magic! We will find out after chemo is done. The Oncologist thinks that what our surgeon was TRYING to say is just that cancer is a serious condition. It has its risks. Even with chemo there are no guarantees. We think he was just trying to make sure we see the whole picture, and not just a rose colored version of it. We are super optimistic though! I told Kent that I have decided he isn't allowed anymore cancer once this is done. So there. :)

Now, treatment 9! It is done! Tuesday he got the initial infusions. He got very sick, very quickly. It has been a harder round than the last few have been, but he is hanging in there. All of the nausea hasn't been as big of a problem until this round. He has to take his medication regularly to keep any food down. Thursday's disconnect was really hard. They injected the Heparin, to make sure his Port access stays clear and usable, and he got REALLY sick. He has spent a lot of time sleeping since Tuesday, but he is starting to feel a little bit better.

Thursday we took Kennedy to meet the staff at the chemo center. Kent had promised one of our nurses that we would bring him to meet everyone. Let's just say he pretty much stole everyone's hearts. :) All the patients had big smiles and kept waving. He loved it! He was waving to everyone and saying "hello" and "hi". It was so cute. :) Anyways, when the nurse did the injection that made Kent so sick Kennedy was outraged! He got really upset and started yelling at the nurse and reaching to pat his daddy's head. I love how protective he is of his daddy. He did calm down and was nice to the nurse again, but it was pretty distressing for a minute there.  On our way out Kent put Kennedy on his shoulders because Kennedy insisted on being with him (he always wants to be with Kent when he realizes daddy is having a hard day. He just pats him and holds him. It is super precious) and everyone was talking about our little ray of sunshine, what a blessing he is to us, what a blessing children are especially during hard times. One woman commented that it was nice to see his smile, "he doesn't realize this is a place with so much pain, he thinks it is so great!" She said it was nice to have the positive attitude there. At age 1 my little boy is already a missionary. :) When we left he waved to everyone. There was a doctor there that we had never seen before, and for whatever reason he caught Kennedy's attention and Kennedy turned and yelled "BYE" as loud as he could. Everyone was laughing. Especially Kent. I think it would be good for Kent, and maybe the other patients too, if Kennedy came every time. However, with all the immunosuppressed issues we don't normally bring him so we can hopefully not get anyone sick. They all loved him though and Kent said it definitely made the disconnect easier. :)

Surgeon

Tuesday we went and saw the surgeon. The appointment went well. Kent wasn't feeling well that day, but we made it! The doctor said he could tell the chemo was taking its toll, but that it is necessary to "reduce the risk factors" of Kent dying. It was an... interesting conversation. He sounded like he thought things were more serious then we currently believe, but he didn't elaborate. We have decided though that we are going to stick to believing that all is going as smoothly as we want it to be going. :)

Anyways... He said that the surgical site seems to be healing well. We talked a little about the upcoming surgery... for whatever reason, that we do not know, they are moving the surgery to an earlier date. It was originally going to happen at the end of October, now it is supposed to happen sometime in September. Probably the middle to the end of the month. We aren't sure why the change, but are hoping it is just because he healed so well. I guess we'll see!

This changes a lot of stuff though. We are figuring out moving and classes and, well, life! We had Kent taking first block classes to maintain his enrollment at BYU, but now we need to find some different classes that he can take second block instead. Hopefully he has recovered enough to handle the classes then. I am sure he will do well. My sweetheart is tough.

The appointment was great because it gave us a clearer perspective on how close we are to "the end" of chemotherapy. We have already come so far, and yet it still feels like it isn't going to end. But we are almost there! Really! We are!! The Lord has guided us this far and we know He will continue to guide us. We are just taking each day as it comes and are so grateful for the blessings in each and every single day.

Round 8

Can you believe we have made it this far? I know when it all started, this point seemed really far away. But we are 2/3rds of the way done!!

Kent has pretty much gotten used to how things feel now. The Heparin (?) injection still makes him gag a lot, he almost threw up this time, but other then that he seems to be having an ok cycle. We even made it out for a walk as a family today. Kennedy was so happy. He just wanted to ride on Daddy's shoulders and walk holding Daddy's hands. :) Kent was pretty exhausted by the end, but his spirits were lifted.

It really made me smile this round, both Tuesday and Thursday, seeing Kent encouraging the other patients. Today especially. There was another young man doing chemo who looked pretty down. Kent simply said "Good luck" and to an older woman "Hang in there" and they both looked surprised, but smiled. The few simple words were enough to maybe get them through the treatment, to know that someone cared. We have had several individuals who have provided us with those words of comfort and they are still with us. I think we might always remember them.

I am so grateful that Kent is thinking about others, and not just himself which could be so easy to do. I love my sweet husband and admire him for what he is going through. I know it isn't easy, but I am grateful he is fighting so hard. Happy Father's Day to my wonderful sweetheart!

Round 7

So far things have been up and down. Good, then bad. Truthfully it has been hard, but for different reasons. Nothing is really new this time, things just keep going the same. He never really got feeling better, so he didn't feel like he got as sick at first. He had a miserable first few days, which was how his last few days of week 6 went, and one of them we spent on an airplane! On our Barker side our sister Heather got married to Zach. It was a beautiful wedding. Kent and I both felt like we really needed to go, so we braved it and it was beautiful. Kent got really sick. It pretty much took everything out of him, but he really enjoyed it and we are so glad we went. He is going to need a few more days to recover from it but should be ready just in time for a new round of chemo. It was so fun being a part of the wedding, reminiscing about our wedding, and just being reminded again what an incredible blessing it is to be married in the temple. To have each other forever, no end ever. I will be with Kent and Kennedy always. How incredible is that? SO incredible.

At the airport: He had to wear a mask at the airport and on the airplane, and he had to ride in a wheelchair. He didn't want to, but he was really weak. At the Raleigh Temple, an LDS Temple where Heather and Zach got married, he also spent the time in a wheelchair. It was such a blessing that we had that. The whole wedding was incredible. There were so many wonderful people there too who helped Kent out. I am so grateful for their support of Kent, all while running around helping out at the reception.

On the trip we found 3 things that tasted good to him.
     - Homemade Strawberry Jam
     - Burritos/Chimichangas
     - Cheddar and Sour Cream Ruffles
The chemo has really affected his taste. Basically, he doesn't taste much. So finding some stuff that tasted good was so great!

Funny moment of this treatment: During our extra fluids day when we got the chemo pack off a sumo wrestler showed up. Well, it was a girl in an inflatable sumo suit. Her mom was there and said she would love it if her daughter came and made her laugh. So her daughter showed up in a blow up costume and had everyone laughing. It was really fun, although almost all of her jokes were really dirty, but I appreciated the sentiment that she wanted to come help her mom, and all the patients smile.